“If you put alcohol and potential in the same room, alcohol beats potential almost every time.”

My journey with addiction began with deep insecurities and the allure of people around me—adults and older kids—who made alcohol look fun and freeing. I didn’t know addiction ran in my family on both sides. It was never talked about when I was growing up, so I had no idea the danger I was walking into.

Alcohol robbed me of so many opportunities. I had a passion for swimming all through my life, but during my senior year of high school, I faced a choice: quit drinking or quit swimming. I chose alcohol.

Becoming a doctor was a dream I held since I was a child. My grandfather was a well-known and deeply respected doctor in Fort Wayne, Indiana. He was kind, compassionate, and beloved by many. His example inspired me to pursue pre-med in college. But my addiction, impulsive nature, and desire to live only in the moment slowly crushed that dream. I lost my focus, and alcohol took over.

Eventually, alcohol, drugs, impulsivity, and thrill-seeking robbed me of everything I could’ve become. I spiraled into self-loathing, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and a crippling sense of unworthiness. My life unraveled faster than I could lower my standards.

Everything came to a head on the early morning of June 8, 2001. In a moment of despair, I attempted to take my own life—not out of planning, but out of desperation. And yet, God intervened.

I believe with all my heart that God showed up that night through my yellow lab, Jake. In the middle of that chaos, Jake came to me with such compassion and sweetness. That moment wasn’t just comfort—it was divine. Through him, God reminded me:

"You are My beloved child. Today is not the day that you die."

That morning, after everything, I slept in the comfort of God's arms—held by a peace I had never known before. When I woke up, I picked up the phone and called my parents in Texas. Through tears, I cried out for help. Not long after, there was a knock on my door. It was my Aunt Carol. She wrapped her arms around me and said, “Let’s go,” and took me to my very first AA meeting. I’ll never forget walking into that room and feeling, for the first time in a long time, like I was home. That was the beginning of my journey through the 12 steps—one day at a time, one moment of grace after another.

Since that day, I have never touched alcohol or drugs, which is truly a miracle.

By the way, if you really wanna tear up you can go listen to the song called Feed Jake by the Pirates of the Mississippi

I knew I needed help years before I entered the rooms of recovery, but I was too blind and afraid to commit to that type of lifestyle. I wanted to be freed and sober, just really did not know how to embrace the journey. As you can see by my response above, it was a pretty dramatic turning point.

Probably the hardest part about admitting I had a problem with addiction was the fear that life would not be fun, sober! I struggled with substances and impulsivity from the age of 14 to 29 until I found sobriety. Almost all of my “friends” Partied hard like I did, yet still held a job and stayed in relationships and seemed to be the “functioning alcoholics” you hear people talk about. Deep down, I really wanted to be freed from my substances and get back to my faith of my childhood, but I was fearful that life would be boring and unfulfilling.

Ohh boy! Was I wrong. Now that I have Jesus at the center of my life, my recovery journey has been a transformational journey.

If you think about it, I went from an alcoholic, partier, wild lifestyle living individual on June 7th, 2001, to a completely freed from substance addiction individual on June 8th, 2001. The only thing that happened in between there was an intimate encounter with God. It's that simple!

My parents, for supporting me, loving me unconditionally, and for picking up the phone on June 8, 2001 to just listen.

My aunt Carol was the greatest initial impact on my recovery, because she took it upon herself to show me what it was like to live a sober life. Then it was my first sponsor, Bill, that showed me the freedom I could experience by going through the steps of recovery. Then it was the community of AA that showed me how to live life on life's terms and the fact that recovery can be fun and exciting. Then I pursued digging deeper into the roots of my Christian faith, and my recovery went to a whole other level. 

I am not saying that recovery from substances has been easy, but it sure has been informational. One of the other issues in my recovery was a gambling addiction, which was much harder to break than substance abuse. That is a whole other story, so I will just stick to my substance abuse recovery journey for this post.

I didn't really have many challenges in early recovery, because I was so excited to be free and feel worthy and feel loved and feel like I was a part of something bigger than myself. The challenges came later when I became a husband (2006), a father (2007, 2010), a business owner (2009-2001), and had so many new responsibilities in my recovery that I was, honestly, still immature in my behaviors to handle.

With all those new responsibilities, I quit doing the things in recovery that put me in a good place in my life. Then I started understanding the struggles with mental health and emotional immaturity, which led to another interesting chapter in my life. (Just wanting to acknowledge my wife for seeking the wisdom of God to see through the chaos.. for without Him, we would not be together today.)

All of this to say that just because the substances or the behaviors go away, does not mean that the journey in recovery is going to be a piece of cake.

Some of the daily (or almost daily) habits that Help me along my transformational journey include staying close to the word of God, being a part of a solid community of Christian men that not only helped me deepen my faith but help the mutual accountability along the way, reaching out to others when I am struggling and being vulnerable, and doing fun activities with my family and our amazing dogs!

Remembering that my identity is in Jesus Christ, not in my circumstances. (2 Corinthians 5:17)

Staying connected to others that will help sharpen me in my life. (Proverbs 27:17)

Setting healthy boundaries in my personal and professional life.

I am currently 18 years into my marriage, which we have been blessed with two amazing teenagers who are rooted in Christ AND that have no desire whatsoever to touch alcohol or drugs, and two wild and crazy dogs that bring us lots of joy in our life. 

My life today involves helping others restore their hope, identity, and purpose in their life. As the owner of Lifted From the Rut Christ-centered Recovery Services, I am blessed to be involved in the lives of thousands of people across the country through interventions, podcasting, authoring books, speaking, outpatient programs, Community involvement, and sharing stories of freedom and hope (Jeremiah 29:11)

I think we covered it. Oh wait, unless you have not heard “God does not make junk!” He loves you, cares for you, and has open arms waiting for you.